“CURSE”-Nayana Nair

To wander free

And still be held captive in your life, in your fears.

To giggle and smile

While you drown in your own tears.

To deny all help with a ‘no’

while inside you cry out for ‘yes’.

To be lost to yourself

But still hoping to be found.

To be doing one thing

And being another.

To be split in two

And still be one.

To be torn apart between

the should and want.

To love-not wholly

To be loved-not enough

A love-never complete.

To be your own greatest enemy

And your sole best friend.

Running from yourself

Is no escape.

For this curse which you dread

Is the darkness which you’re drawn to.

The curse of being afraid to die

And yet afraid to live.