“Sweet Nothings” – Nayana Nair

i crawl into another embrace,
scratch the surface of my fake love
to find something true.
hopes.
hopes.
is this what they call hope?
it must be.

the coffee turns cold as my story ends.
again i am wearing a skin i have stolen.
the one breathing beside me
has a knack for sad stories recited by happy girls,
of being a knight to one he doesn’t have to save.

me,
i love drowning the world in sadness
(the only way i can take anyone’s breath away)
i love leaving loose ends,
leaving people behind-
i call it the fear of being left behind.
i have a list of similar innocent motivation
for every mess i make, for the mess i have become.

when he leaves
i throw away the coffee he never drinks.
i get over my urge to be seen for what i am.
i dip my fingers into another color
that he might like, or at least remember.

21 Comments

  1. Beautiful poem but left with mixed feelings. Running after someone who was never yours. Leaving you behind in search of own self . Hope my understanding the poem is not wrong.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Yupp, your understanding is same as what I meant to express. How sometimes people forget themselves trying to become someone who can be loved back. How we ourselves know it as a form of dishonesty, and yet we learn to live with it for sake of love that was never our to begin with.
      I am really glad that you liked my poem πŸ™‚
      Thank you πŸ™‚

  2. Markus J. says:

    cool

  3. macalder02 says:

    It often happens that we are wrong to direct our feelings to the wrong person. So much is love, that we do not realize the pain that causes to know it. For that reason, your verses are loaded with that feeling and a magnificent poem comes out. I loved reading it.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      I agree with you. With the wrong person, all our sincerity would not be enough to make things work.
      Really glad that you liked my poem πŸ™‚
      Thank you πŸ™‚

  4. Wow, that really is something of a pessimistic view of life. πŸ™‚

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      I am good at pessimism πŸ™‚ πŸ˜€
      Thanks πŸ™‚

      1. But you have a whole magical and mystical life to look forward to πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ Keep writing I do enjoy your work πŸ™‚

      2. Nayana Nair says:

        Thank you so much πŸ™‚ Means a lot πŸ™‚

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      he he πŸ™‚
      happens once in a while I guess πŸ™‚

      1. A great form to have🌷🌷🌷

  5. The narrator strikes me as a complex, multi-dimensional, morally ambiguous character. Pretty interesting!

    Thanks for sharing this one!

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      ‘morally ambiguous’…I like the sound of it.
      I was not sure what it was, but you have described it perfectly, the image that I had for this character.
      Glad you liked it πŸ™‚
      Thanks Paul πŸ™‚

      1. Would you agree with me that moral certainty is intrinsically boring, even when it’s clearly correct?

        I mean, who wants to argue that female genital mutilation is not morally wrong? All the same, it’s much more interesting to think about an abused man or woman cheating on her abusive partner.

        Reminds me. Last night I came across a scientific study that found women are more likely to cheat on partners who try to cage them than on partners who do not.

      2. Nayana Nair says:

        ‘Moral certainty’ is an interesting topic.
        I would say, according to me, rather than moral certainty I find uniformity of what we think is moral is more boring.

        If there is a person who has a fixed set of wrongs and rights. I find it interesting to see how that person person navigates through life, deals with situation while trying to stick to their morals. When we see someone struggling with an issue that in our opinion has a really easy solution, we wonder why this person won’t go with the obvious solution. But they can’t because of what they are and what they believe in. The same way we can’t do certain things in life, even when we are aware of this option, of this course of action that would save us a lot of trouble, only because of what we believe in.

        On the other hand uniformity of morals throughout the human population is more boring because people are not really thinking using their own brain. When they follow a set of actions that they must do, things they must think. It is almost they tend to be more of puppet than human. I think even when our society and religion passes us morals, we must question them, think for ourselves why they are right.

        This is my personal view though.

        About an abused person or a person cheating on their abusive partner.
        Taking away anyone’s freedom is bound the make the person bitter. Sometimes people cross the line that separates romantically cute jealousy and controlling behavior. But I am not sure if that warrants cheating though. Since I have never been in such situation, I do not think my opinions on this would be correct. It would almost seem like preaching about something I have no idea of.
        But hypothetically speaking, if I was in such situation I do not think I would cheat someone I am with, irrespective of their behavior. I personally do not like going people’s back like that. I would rather break that relationship, than to cheat someone I love or once loved. Because I do not see the point.
        Let’s say you fell in love with someone else because your current partner doesn’t treat you well, not because they are special. Doesn’t that sound unfair to the new love as well. That the only thing that made you fall in love is your own misery.
        But as I said that this all hypothetical. I am not sure if life works like that. About the emotions that comes into play in such situation. So my opinion on that is not exactly worth considering.

  6. etiliyle says:

    β™₯️β™₯️

  7. Hopes!
    Regards
    Shiva
    🎢

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