“Blue white love” – Nayana Nair

As I wait for you
in the back seat of your car
almost losing sense of my limbs and my scars
I smile – the sad smile I would never use when I am sober.
I smile thinking,
thankful,
at least I am not crying and waiting
in the trunk of some stranger’s car.
I don’t necessarily love you
but I guess I love your pattern, the predictability of your anger,
the time I have to prepare my skin to shatter.
I think about the times I have been broken
and abandoned by the loves and by the men before you.
I think about your anger that I never lets me forget this past.
I think about your hands that I can count on
even when your hands love my pain the most.
I think of your funny jokes, the food you cook in your good mood,
the songs that you hum as you move around the house,
your bluish white wings and your flickering halo
when you are asleep by my side.
I think I can love you a bit after all.

9 Comments

  1. Shefali says:

    Absolutely loved it. ๐Ÿงก

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Thank you so much ๐Ÿ™‚
      Really glad that you liked it ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Pia Majumdar says:

    This is so beautifully penned dear, always love your words hon ๐Ÿ‘โค๏ธ

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Thank you so much dear ๐Ÿ˜Š Means a lot to hear that โ˜บ๏ธโค๏ธ
      Really glad that you liked it

  3. Awesome Words…The poem was just amazing…Keep up the good work….God bless you dear…Keep smiling.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Glad that you liked my poem.
      Thanks you โ˜บ๏ธ๐Ÿ˜Š
      God bless you too dear. Have an awesome day ahead. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  4. WildHeart says:

    This is so heart_shatteringly lovely!! ๐Ÿ’”โฃ๏ธ

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Really glad that you liked it ๐Ÿ™‚
      Thanks a lot ๐Ÿ™‚

      1. WildHeart says:

        Most welcome โฃ๏ธ

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