“Now I cannot hate myself” – Nayana Nair

But now I am not
me anymore.
Now I cannot hate myself
like I used to before.
Liking myself was never option,
for me anyway.
If only I could be one person
with a constant heart,
maybe then I could have
understood myself with enough time,
could have found the heart to see myself
as a mere human that I am.
But this,
this possession of my body
and my heart
by a new unknown
everyday
is tiring.
Today
the loneliness that I couldn’t show,
the songs I was supposed to forget,
the kiss that never left my lips
all become my new self.
Tomorrow it will be something else.
But it is a tiring relief
to lose my hate to confusion.

8 Comments

    1. True. Change can be healthy. But I think that the fighting the change is also part of our story.

      A quote that I was reminded of just now (may or may not be related to the point being discussed):

      “It’s not the final judgement of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ that’s important. What matters is that you come to that decision yourself. That you agonize over it and eventually accept it.”- Akane Tsunemori (Psycho pass)

      Have a good day. Stay safe.
      Thanks for all the comments. 🙂

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