“i dreamt of you today” – Nayana Nair


i dreamt of you today.
today i was a lost child
digging through the mist
with my fragile bleeding lonely fingers
for the name of the one i love,
the one i didn’t get to love enough. this name,
seated in the golden shrine of autumns, was nothing like
the name i remembered. the rust was eating away its mass,
the reality was tinkering with its gravity. holding it now,
felt very close to embracing an illusion.
light and time pass right through it
as if they are illuminating and revering
that never was.
i am starting to forget, i realize.


  1. I have copious notes for an autobiography, which may never get published. I do wonder how my recollection of characters has changed over time, and how their recollections might be changing over time if they can still remember me. Often what I remember are the good times, but other occasions are fading. Are the perceptions that I now have about relationships altering over time, was the love really that strong, did the events actually occur in that way. You always manage to write fascinating material about so many topics. I really do admire your skills Nayana.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      I also often feel the same as you. Often times I feel what I remember is not the people or the event but rather just a memory of it. Like every time I am repeating things in mind so that I do not forget but slowly I feel I am also changing those memories and like those witnesses with flawed memory of incident I can no longer tell how much of it was real and how much of it are the embellishment of my own romanticism.
      I hope your autobiography does get published. I know it takes lot of effort and sometimes pain to go through to put it all down. But I guess it would also allow one to take another look at the life lived and fins something that we hadn’t noticed before, some gift the ones we have shared our lives with have left for us. I wish you all the best for your work on your autobiography. 🙂

      I am always glad and thankful that you find my work meaningful. 🙂
      Thank you so much 🙂

      Hope you have a beautiful day.

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