The sun in your eyes sets so slowly. I need to remind myself that this is not the end. This is not the end. This is not the end. This is but a chasm left open for the love to see. For the love to see and for this love to grow into the darkness we hide from each other, from this world, from our own eyes. She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me today, tomorrow she may not, she will love me as long as she can. These are the words I got to say and suffer over, again and again. These are the words that made me walk a little bit more. Is there anything more beautiful than this? That you were the light, the wind, the silence, the flickering hope in my heart. How can I lose you, when you are all that I am.
Tag Archives: again
i held on,
only because i feared
i might regret giving up on someone
whom i could have probably loved again with time.
i held on even when
this scenario of finding love in you again
didn’t give me any happiness.
love only taught me fear.
fear of hurting you.
fear of being hurt.
in this castle of forever
i haunted the one who haunted me back.
we have hidden our bodies, our heart
somewhere no one can find.
we wait for the other
to give up or grow up.
we wait for someone else
to pull us apart.
i don’t want to move on from you,
even though you are not what i want anymore.
because i fear
that i might start to love you again tomorrow.
tomorrow – when it is already too late to take back words.
my sad winter sunshine
i am here for you.
we can stay sad for however long you want.
i don’t remember the happy you.
i am not hanging around to see your other face.
i have no affection
for what you are trying to become again.
i loved rain once.
now snowfall is my new thing,
you are my new thing-
my old love in a new skin.
the sky is endless, the time infinite
we have long way to go
before we become anything permanent.
as you sleep,
I fold myself up
into someone I used to be.
I try to fit into the space beside you
where no longer fit.
But your warmth
now only brings me tears.
I wish it didn’t.
Even though I stopped wanting you,
I don’t think I stopped loving you.
I wish I didn’t.
I know I will give you up someday
but till then
I wanted to gift you few more days-
few more days of ignorance.
You will probably sleep through them
not knowing how much I must have loved you
to stay beside, you even when you were not watching,
withstanding my pain as long as possible.
The night grows deeper,
your sleep lasts longer,
my cries become louder,
but there is no one for me,
no one to care, if I cry.
Please wake up
and see my tears
before I can hide them.
Put me to sleep,
please love me back,
love me again,
before I give up on you.
Now that I am made of evening skies,
if I move into that night,
I can’t ever return.
The one who tastes the morning sun,
the one who kisses your lips,
the one who somehow lives on
won’t be me.
So let me remain this beautiful.
Let us stop here.
The snow would be here soon
and time would bring us
small doses of the soothing forgetfulness.
See how you start to love me again
when your heaven and your heart
give up on all their rules.