“Not So Bad” – Nayana Nair

he sings the most beautiful song.
so beautiful
that the sky becomes a reflection of the heart
that he can barely carry in himself.
the words on his lips
they break, they sound different,
feel different,
they sound like the first cry of a baby-
the violent coming to life.
they run and collide and shatter
against the rough indifferent surface
of this dying world, a not-so-bad world.
he becomes a not-so-bad singer.
as he runs out of breath and love
someone places a coin of gold in his hands.
he means to feel grateful for this compensation,
but all he can do is hold his tongue, hold his tears.
hold his bitterness in himself
and sing another song dreaming, waiting
for an honest reply, a genuine care,
an understanding gaze in return for laying bare his humanness.

Day 1 – Quote Challenge

Angela has nominated me to participate in 3 Day Quote Challenge and I can’t thank her enough for thinking of my blog. The mere fact that my blog crossed your mind is a really a big thing for me. Thanks a lot. 🙂

Here is the link to the post on her blog.

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Day 1:

“What we seek is some kind of compensation for what we put up with.”
― Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance

There are so many things that I don’t want to go through. And would do anything so that I never end up in the situation where an unpleasant reality is forced on me. After all the efforts that I take to keep my life peaceful, I do end up with all kinds of chaos and suffering in my life. I am not  complaining of how my life is lacking and how I deserve better (for somewhere in my heart I know that I also deserve worse).

There are nights, when I can’t fall asleep, cause I don’t know how long can I face all this, how long I can pretend to be strong. But there all also days when I wake up thinking of all that is possible if only I can endure a little more. One half of my heart is drunk on misery and other half on dreams. This misery and this joy are not related as cause and event. They are something that I must experience in parallel.

I think the scenarios of possible happiness are the only thing that has kept me alive till now.