RSS Feed

Tag Archives: door

“Thorn” – Nayana Nair

tumblr_nv5nc3L6KA1qfm2kmo1_500

You are a thorn in my heart
that only hurts, that only digs deeper
when in rare moments
I find my way to doors in my life
that can’t be opened now
and I stand helplessly in front of you
whom I no longer love.
When you utter the same words
but they sound different
and I realize that I have never been around
to notice this change.
We may walk in a present
disconnected from our feelings in past.
We are nothing to each other now.
Your sorrows are no longer due to my mistakes
and I feel nothing but relief for that.
But sometimes,
only sometimes
an unfulfilled dream breathes in me
refusing to die,
for it is happy to have you around.

“Version” – Nayana Nair

Posted on

2b831e07-a1c1-4a71-ada4-9096559fa145

Sometimes the hatred, the bias that
people around him smoked
sticks to his clothes, his skin, his tongue
when I come near him.
He can wash it from himself with a sleep.
He can leave it at the door, when he steps in.
But I can’t wash it out of my mind.

leaves-line-drawing-23

In my mind
I mix up the person he is and the person he has to be.
But I realise that I do not know the person he is,
I only know the person he has to be for me,
I only resent the person he has to be for others.

leaves-line-drawing-23

The person he is, looks at me from his corner of eyes
and this stranger looks at me
not across oceans, not across roads of fate,
but across the versions of us filling up the space between us,
the versions we can never throw away.

leaves-line-drawing-23

This stranger looks at me and gives me the smile
that he has to wear for me.
For me to realise the love I have for the the days
I share with this person who spends his days with me,
loses his ways with me and grows old with me.
I smile back becoming the person I have to be for him,
becoming the version I love the most.

“Asking for More” – Nayana Nair

Posted on

1a22c7812ffe8dc30e005d5495d001bc

The lost all gather
at the same door as I.
They shout, yell and cry.
Praise and tell lies.
To be taken in.
To be cared for.
To be chosen.
To be looked at, even once.

Do they also feel smaller
for standing here and waiting,
for asking things whose void eats you up.
This void
that has a fondness, an appetite
for the ones who can’t unlearn caring.
Which becomes bigger
feasting on the silent phone,
on unifinished conversations,
on the hollow rumours, on the dirt on your name,
smeared by people
who know better
but continue to do worse.

The void for things,
that even when attained,
outgrows the want that creates it.
Is there anyone
who has got what he asked
and stopped asking for more.
Who has found himself
by asking and pleading for acceptance,
by being nice and patient,
by cutting themselves up
to fit the template
of someone else’s ever growing void.

“No Plans” – Nayana Nair

Posted on

gbgxmZ7v_400x400

She looks at the clock.
The time tells
in 4 hours her husband has to leave,
she woke up too soon.
She wakes up and looks at the clock again.
In 20 minutes he will need his daily tea,
he sounds bitter all day
if it is not the first thing he sees.
She will have minutes to cook what he likes,
to check his ironed clothes and polished shoes.
Few more seconds till the door closes
leaving her in his house,
surrounded by his belongings,
and with the clock that has no plans for her.
She sighs
and sits till she can’t feel this sting.
She looks at clock once again.
9 hours more for him to come back.

Day 3- Quote Challenge

Posted on

exellent-open-door-black-and-white-old-log-cabin-inside-design-ideas-lovely-open-door-black-and-white

“You’ve become an accomplice in your own annihilation and there is nothing you can do about it. Everything you do closes a door somewhere ahead of you. And finally there is only one door left.”
― Cormac McCarthy

Now I am not sure what this quote exactly makes me feel. But every time I read this, I see in front of me that one door left. It fills me up with a kind of relief and fear at the same time. It is as if every small action of mine will change my life in a drastic ways. It is like choosing a destiny that I cannot see. Irreversible nature of my decision, the narrowing of the world to fewer door, fewer dreams, fewer options is frightening. But it also fills me with a sense of responsibility and control. It feels like a power that I do not know how to put to use, but it is still a power. Like a blind person walking on a minefield, where even having eyes may not be of much help considering the chaos that surrounds me. Even if a portion of choice is in my hand, I do have a say, but not much. I cannot turn back and look at all the doors I can’t go back through. I am just left with that one line I am travelling (many that I can’t), the line my decisions create to that last door, the line we call fate.

“A little bit longer” – Nayana Nair

Posted on

water_leaf_yellow_pebbles_transparent_stream_55775_1920x1080

This morning
I find myself longing to look at the sun
and the morsel of half-cooked food
stays on my tongue
a little bit longer than it should.
The door opens with a sound of crashing waves
and so I know it is you who has come.
With my back to your face,
I smile to myself.
I have kept aside a portion
of this tasteless life for you.
The silent mornings, the passing time,
these aging bones-
don’t seem as bad as it did,
now that you are here.

“Immune to Good Advice” – Nayana Nair

dfevfeve (1)

When my own opinions can’t budge the doors
that are closed on my face,
I run back to these books
which list how to think, what to want.
I do not look for how it is done
I look for what I did wrong.
But my mind is so immune to a good advise
that the words that I read make me sick
even when they could be my medicine.
But I don’t yet know if they are,
cause my wish for a better life fades away
in front of the genuineness my heart demands from me.

Clear And Refreshing

Pop, indie and underground music in Japan

My Life Lived Full

If you aren't living on the edge, you're taking up too much space

joeyfullystated

Narrative of a Neurotic & Other Random Nonsense

Random Writings on the Bathroom Wall

This is all about my amazingly mundane south metro urbanite life cuz I like having fun as long as the Police aren't somehow involved.

TASHNEE .V.MAVEE

PERSONAL STYLE, FASHION BLOGGER AND LIFE EXPERIENCES

Susanne Haun

Kunst im Bereich Zeichnung und Malerei von Susanne Haun - Art special rawing and painting of Susanne Haun

Havoc and Consequence

(overcome your fears)

paeansunpluggedblog

songs unheard by the poet next door

lynz real cooking

lynz real life

A Reading Writer

I write because I read. I read because I write.

DoodleScribbles

Scribblings and scrawls of a hopeless romantic soul

From the Perimeter . . .

Thoughts & Poetry for all people Copyright 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018 all content.

Björn Rudbergs writings

Poetry and fiction by a physicist from the dark side

Dragon's Lair

Poetry and Fire

hbhatnagar

Not-so-random thoughts

Just moon148

notonehundredfortyeightmoons.wordpress.com

In My Melody

Translated Chinese Pop Music

Lost Route

Riscopriamo la bellezza della natura, camminando...

Kdrama Kisses

Everyone remembers the first time they were kissed by a kdrama!