“You will always be my wonderful love” – Nayana Nair

Though onceyou were bigger than me,this is all I can spare for you,these feelingsthat won’t even add up to a drop of tear. I knoweven in my sorrowthat i must not hate you.You have been my wonderful beautiful lightin ways you didn’t intend to. I have used up all my gratitudein forgetting the daysyou filledContinue reading ““You will always be my wonderful love” – Nayana Nair”

“Fossil” – Nayana Nair

Drop by drop the wax fillsthe bucket of broken butterflies. I am falling into another sleep,into another death that is warm,that embraces me like no lover ever has. I feel the pain in my wings, and unlike other daysI try to think that this will never pass.That I will remain like this, with a bitContinue reading ““Fossil” – Nayana Nair”

“A lie for every fear” – Nayana Nair

I walk past houses that are too silent to be there.Another drop of tearlands on my hand. I dare not stop and look. I fear I might end up finding my own home that I had left. In my eyes I might end up holding the face of the onewhose sorrow I can’t still bear.Continue reading ““A lie for every fear” – Nayana Nair”

“Cutouts of Star Factories” – Nayana Nair

Though the sky is filled with lightsthe nights on this land are lonely as ever.Again I am in lovewith a part of sky,with things that we call heavenly only because they are out of our reach,only because they are not ours to keep,because every god seems to love them more. I end up on websitesContinue reading ““Cutouts of Star Factories” – Nayana Nair”

“Meet me on a sunless day” – Nayana Nair

the sun is so much brighter than it used to be it makes me wonder if i remembers my days correctly. has it always been like this, when did my eyes start creating its own darkness. (is there a word for it? like there is a word for plants creating food from the drops ofContinue reading ““Meet me on a sunless day” – Nayana Nair”

“Empty Shells” – Nayana Nair

The list of all the words that I use and don’t know meaning of: friend, understanding, dream, ethics, distance, space, wait, promise, family, kindness, virtue, trust, love, love, love, love, love, love, (I was told I need to be especially obsessed with love if I want to be normal) I, me, memory (real or invented),Continue reading ““Empty Shells” – Nayana Nair”

“If this was Home” – Nayana Nair

There was never a point of timewhen I could sit back and say-“This is home.This is where I will always be.No one can take me away from here.Here is where I am bound to be.”Because I could never hold onto anything even when I wanted to. *** I was always convincedthat there is something veryContinue reading ““If this was Home” – Nayana Nair”

“Saviour” – Nayana Nair

This sad heart of yours,this heart that I love the most,I wondered oncewhy it couldn’t rise above what it is suffering fromeven when you have me.Why as I sit with you talking about myselfyou smile as if trying to contain the tears that you won’t be able to explain. x I have always felt thatContinue reading ““Saviour” – Nayana Nair”

“Unnoticed” – Nayana Nair

Yesterday, a line etched on my hands slipped away from the skin that once held it so dearly and still I lived on as if the the fate I lived now was the one I was destined for. I like to call it yesterday for it is easy to suppose that we always knew whatContinue reading ““Unnoticed” – Nayana Nair”

“Close these windows” – Nayana Nair

I continue to live in the light of my own making knowing it is the only light I’ll ever find. For a moment I wonder, how I look to you. Loosing my sorrow. Loosing my frown. Loosing my mind. One by one I close these windows through which your eyes prod me, to see what’sContinue reading ““Close these windows” – Nayana Nair”