“Always Shining” – Nayana Nair

. Are they finally drowning?The sails, the flags, the songsthe party, and the expensive backless silks.The rings and guns and blood shining.Always shining.They are finally coming for us.We will again have someone’s face in front of usat least for a whileand we will sing songsthat they have no choice but to listen to.The cries andContinue reading ““Always Shining” – Nayana Nair”

“The eyes of my mother” – Nayana Nair

I planted the idea of a happy family,a happy tomorrow,into the eyes of my motherwith breaking tips of my pencilsagainst her granite eye lashes. I told her the story about the boywho is ever so sadbecause his parents didn’t care enough,who weeps on his empty birthdays,who weeps into my heart.I tell her I am notContinue reading ““The eyes of my mother” – Nayana Nair”

“My grief has my face” – Nayana Nair

My grief has my face.My grief has only questions in her eyes-questions that require me to cryand accept the cruel face of the love I have got.My grief instead gets my silent embrace,my refusal to choose better, for her sake or mine.My grief has my faceand my heart that only knows defeatand only in defeatContinue reading ““My grief has my face” – Nayana Nair”

“Variant of Love” – Nayana Nair

You held me as I broke again and again.Your warm chest tried to hold me, to keep me alive.I couldn’t cry anymoreI felt indebted to you I loved you. You left me againin the crowd that you promised to protect me from.I called you, your number and you name-becoming useless to me with each passingContinue reading ““Variant of Love” – Nayana Nair”

“Always, Only” – Nayana Nair

You told me of love and what it does to your heartand how your heart wants to see me and love me alone.But it is too hard. A harder task than you imagined it to be. You loved me for my silence, for my grace of letting you go,and for the tears in my eyesalways,Continue reading ““Always, Only” – Nayana Nair”

“A lot like your heart” – Nayana Nair

Yours is the name I take witheverything that feels like fatebut it isn’t. I have walked towards youevery time I saw your face.I have cursed my feet and my heartwhen you left me again. I can’t feel wronged,because you won’t let me.You have a way with my heart.You know the hurt I cannot give youContinue reading ““A lot like your heart” – Nayana Nair”

“We are not made for any season” – Nayana Nair

The cold that we depended onto hide our heartsdidn’t last long.First our warmth, then our fire,then our wild will-one by one they convinced uswhy we need them, that without themwe’ll never actually live.One by oneeverything we didn’t want to bestood facing us, climbing higher and fasteron our ladders out of our hell.I kept repeating myContinue reading ““We are not made for any season” – Nayana Nair”

“The Year of Frost Starts” – Nayana Nair

You walk in with a cake of rust,two hours late.You kiss me ,wait for me to smile,to say thanks,to make another offering of myselfat your shrine. You tell me of love,the only love that you cannotget out of your heart.This love that suffocates you these daysmore than before.How my face asks for too much,even whenContinue reading ““The Year of Frost Starts” – Nayana Nair”

“Virtual Image” – Nayana Nair

“the image in mirror is never formed“ I copied this slowlyfrom my friend’s notes,reading too much into it. I moved my handsover the new definition of real. I traced the lines, the dull path of lightas faithfully as I couldbut the solid blue lines of ink touch the glassand are broken cleanly by the lawsContinue reading ““Virtual Image” – Nayana Nair”

“What I Remember (27)” – Nayana Nair

i think this suits me most-to lose myselfand yet look okay.god gave me a face that always looks okayeven when i don’t want it to.(there have been only handful of dayswhen i want to look as miserable i am.) i wonder how it feelsto say“do i look broken today yet?“i cried all night”.i have neverContinue reading ““What I Remember (27)” – Nayana Nair”