“I am afraid of the ones who still see hope in me” – Nayana Nair

They are beautiful peoplewith beautiful heartand they really want to mend meand that’s scary. It is scarybecause I can’t seem to feellove or gratitudefor anyone who affirmsthat I am as bad as I imagined myself to be. It is scarybecause my disease knows meand my cure doesn’t.And the better life sounds like hellto my brokenContinue reading ““I am afraid of the ones who still see hope in me” – Nayana Nair”

“You will always be my wonderful love” – Nayana Nair

Though onceyou were bigger than me,this is all I can spare for you,these feelingsthat won’t even add up to a drop of tear. I knoweven in my sorrowthat i must not hate you.You have been my wonderful beautiful lightin ways you didn’t intend to. I have used up all my gratitudein forgetting the daysyou filledContinue reading ““You will always be my wonderful love” – Nayana Nair”

“Now what?” – Nayana Nair

For a change I made breakfast for oneand didn’t cry over it.I didn’t turn back as he packed his favorite partsof this heavy life with me.He didn’t ask me about the things I have hidden away.I felt a bitter thankfulnessthat my memories are mine to keep,that my beautiful moments have been erased from his heart,thatContinue reading ““Now what?” – Nayana Nair”

“What I Remember (10)” – Nayana Nair

I want to write about the boring, about all that is insignificant, about the trust that lasts, about the promises that are kept, about the things we don’t have to beg from god. I belive there must be some things in life that goes as we wanted to, that didn’t take our effort, our prayersContinue reading ““What I Remember (10)” – Nayana Nair”

“All Such Things” – Nayana Nair

The days that starts with a painful realization of the world. The nights that stops with this awareness put to sleep. And you whom I can’t shake off from my thoughts. All such things that happen just because they do and not because I am any better or any worse than anyone else. All suchContinue reading ““All Such Things” – Nayana Nair”

“Apples” – Nayana Nair

As she hands me a slice of peeled apples, I wonder how many people she has fed. How many felt the gratitude for it, only for the time its taste lasted on their tongue. What it must feel like, peeling apples for your daughter while she is slowly peeling you away from her life. UnknowinglyContinue reading ““Apples” – Nayana Nair”