“Always, Only” – Nayana Nair

You told me of love and what it does to your heart
and how your heart wants to see me and love me alone.
But it is too hard. A harder task than you imagined it to be.

You loved me for my silence, for my grace of letting you go,
and for the tears in my eyes
always, only for you.

You stand outside my heart, filling my insides with
your shadows, with your hopes.
Becoming my only light.
Asking me to step out of myself,
asking me if I am up
for another search of your heart-
that you have left behind
in someone else’s heart tonight.

You kiss my hand and tell me
you like this better-
me being your hope, your home
rather than being your wretched love-
the love that that leads you to your worst face.

I close my eyes
and again
I try to forget
what I wanted you to be,
what I hoped you would be for me.
I try to forget the wretched love you have become.

“TONIGHT” -Nayana Nair

There is a lot

I have to ask for.

A lot I have to pray.

Knowing love is not enough

To live a life.

I’d rather ask for respect.

I’d rather ask for understanding.

I’d rather have a heart that adores me.

I’d rather have a heart that feels my pain.

I’d rather ask for friendship.

I’d rather beg for care.

Love is meant to be all this.

But somehow it isn’t.

Tonight I won’t ask for all

That I have lost to love.

Tonight I won’t ask

For a change of heart, a miracle.

For tonight, sleep will be enough.

Is that too much to ask?

“It rained last night”- Nayana Nair

(Image taken from highqualitypic.blogspot.com)

In front of my dear flashing screen,

I lay snuggled in my bed,

Dozens of lives were put up on show,

But I was engrossed in my own sorrow instead,

.

But the next second a flash, a thunder caught my sight,

Foretelling the rain that is to follow tonight.

.

>.<

.

I slide the glass doors of my balcony,

And stepped outside to be hugged by the wind,

Flowing like an unstoppable river,

In front of it, I felt like a small kid,

.

Compared to the great expanse before me,so small my plight,

In some seconds, rain will wash away my sorrow, tonight.

.

>.<

.

The rhythm of the wind,

Echoed in my ears

A sweet song on its own,

And then the first drop fell on my cheeks, disguising my tears,

.

Here comes my savior hero, my knight

Here comes the rain tonight.

.

>.<

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I rise up from my fear and

As if I have been awakened from a dream to reality,

Like  a phoenix rising from its own ashes,

I can now at least see reason despite my insanity,

.

The sky is showering its blessings at the stroke of midnight,

As everyone sleeps, I am awakened by the rain tonight.

.

>.<

.

These water drops have returned home,

After a long journey’s cessation,

They bounce , fall and jump around,

In this solitude, I witness a unique celebration.

.

I can’t find words for describing, to write,

Their celebration, my hopes and the rain tonight.

.

>.<

.

This joy, this celebration,

My heart it feeds,

These drops though small and negligible

To my mind, my peace serves as seeds,

.

It rains everyday in my heart,

But finally it rains tonight.

.

>.<

.

With sun’d filtered beams,

Reaching me with all its shine

The rain must leave and so do I,

Like two best friends we’ll again meet sometime

.

I have forgotten my sorrow, its reason and everything’s alright

The only thing I remember is the fact that it rained last night