“the shadow at the foot of my bed” – Nayana Nair

today is the birthday of one another oddity of mine.on a day like this,few calendars agoi learnt how to turn my helplessness into my charm.i learnt to fill the glasses, the throats of everyone i knowwith something sweet, with a taste they can’t name.i learnt to become something that can’t be known or hurt.in myContinue reading ““the shadow at the foot of my bed” – Nayana Nair”

“What I Remember (18)” – Nayana Nair

today’s sadness is brought uponby the increasing count of the words that i have forbidden myself to speak. today’s sadness is brought upon by the particularly sad song that i have chosen to listen. today’s sadness is partially due to the strangers with sweet eyes,partially due to my angels with weak hearts,and also the factContinue reading ““What I Remember (18)” – Nayana Nair”

“All your cold dark songs” – Nayana Nair

as i get inside the crowded bus,a phone rings.a ringtone just like yours. has the world shrunk to the sizeof the tragedy we created,that i find you like this? i know it is not you,but it could be.so i do not turn back.it could be you,so i try not to cry. this is not wherewalkingContinue reading ““All your cold dark songs” – Nayana Nair”

“Is anything left of my mask? ” – Nayana Nair

in not so many words,but maybe just really few.can you tell me what you see?when i am waiting for my turn,when i am suspiciously silent,when i am creating another corner in this round room to sit, to sink into,when i say no and get hated upon,when i am walking away, always walking away. can youContinue reading ““Is anything left of my mask? ” – Nayana Nair”

“Gray Crowd” – Nayana Nair

There is only this life, that is made by imitation of stories. Stories that told me how to feel and what to say, told me to cry and ruin myself if you turn away, told me to leave my everything for your sake, never told me how tedious all this could become and how muchContinue reading ““Gray Crowd” – Nayana Nair”

“Same Strength” – Nayana Nair

The bridges fell one dayleaving me stranded on the other side of the place that could have been my home.A home.I realized only when I was placed out of it. – These bridges that betray me now have once been the only companion to my lonely feet. All that kept me alive have turned againstContinue reading ““Same Strength” – Nayana Nair”

“Wrong Way” – Nayana Nair

They forgot to teach me the most basic thing- to know which side I should take to keep a check on papers, to see sense when someone tells me what is politically right and to agree when they tell me that identity is everything not only mine, but of all those who live on sameContinue reading ““Wrong Way” – Nayana Nair”

“Turn the Page” – Nayana Nair

“So much has been lost” she said as she turned the page. I looked at her and then resumed my efforts of escape as she did. I couldn’t ask her what she meant for this question exists between us like a distance that connects us. I feared that I could never recount my losses toContinue reading ““Turn the Page” – Nayana Nair”

“Absolutes” – Nayana Nair

From my grip I lose yet another word- now alien to my lips and life. From the corner of my eyes, I watch it die the same death as me. Now the stories I told myself have become a little more unreasonable, when the words and ideas that I took as absolute turned out toContinue reading ““Absolutes” – Nayana Nair”