“I let him drive” – Nayana Nair

I roll down my windowhoping for the first timethat I knew how to driveso that I wouldn’t have a confused witnessto my impulse of moving forward by a mileand falling down by a heartbeat. “Is everything alright?”,he asks me too often.I don’t bother to calm him down by saying ‘yes’as I was doing an hourContinue reading ““I let him drive” – Nayana Nair”

“Summer Mood” – Nayana Nair

my feet relentlessly insiston burning themselvesfor the sake of summer mood. i wear a shirt too big for me.a wear a smile a bit too small.i wear the worry of my parents on my neck. i feel their fearwhen i smile back at strangers.i pretend to be the sand that no one can hurt.i pretendContinue reading ““Summer Mood” – Nayana Nair”

“i will only stay till your love fades” – Nayana Nair

i might love youor i might not.but if you ask me‘do you love me?’i would always say ‘yes’. i would always stay up late with you,would worryif you are happy? if you’ve eaten?if you’ve slept well?i would sit with you in an empty eatery till late,i would sit with you till you felt like talking.iContinue reading ““i will only stay till your love fades” – Nayana Nair”

“No Other Choice” – Nayana Nair

When I held your hands, you told me I am calculating. When I listened to your worries you told me that it is because I have no other choice, because I have no one else anyway. When I cried you told me I am manipulating. When I speak of my feelings for you, you tellContinue reading ““No Other Choice” – Nayana Nair”

“Let Me Wait” – Nayana Nair

As you smile and tell me all the words that make you look happy, I can only wait for you. I can only wait till you decide to you let me know your tears, your worries, like you have let me know your love. But meanwhile, I won’t knock incessantly on the doors of yourContinue reading ““Let Me Wait” – Nayana Nair”

“What I Remember(5)” – Nayana Nair

No it is not an escape anymorebecauseit is not only me who is into these addictions of milder kind.All I want is what everyone already has.Don’t worry these books and music I get high ondon’t alter my perception of realitylike they used to before.So I am fine with irrelevant goals of having one more bookContinue reading ““What I Remember(5)” – Nayana Nair”

“I don’t want to be kind” – Nayana Nair

Excuses are futile, reasons unnecessary.You may have sad storybut who doesn’t.I don’t want to know what you went through.I don’t want to melt my indifference and disregardand become the only character who suffers for their understanding.I don’t want to be that lone person who considers even small actionsso that the ones who are already hurt,don’tContinue reading ““I don’t want to be kind” – Nayana Nair”

“I won’t be fine” – Nayana Nair

Why does your lie hurt me so when I know it is a lie? Why are we ready to act as if things have gone wrong between us, when you still love me like you used to, when I still feel like it was only yesterday that you changed my life merely by existing. IContinue reading ““I won’t be fine” – Nayana Nair”

“Aunt” – Nayana Nair

“Yes, I do have plans for my future my dear aunt.” I say, after I see her put her cup down and look at me with sympathy and resentment. “How can we not worry. It is your future we are talking about.” Actually, I never had these conversation, at least not with my aunt. IContinue reading ““Aunt” – Nayana Nair”

“Steal” – Nayana Nair

The tree I grew on, the frozen giant I wrapped myself around has lost its strength, its life to keep someone like me alive. Can I say it has given up its life for me when I am the one that stuck to it first, when I am the one that steals what I cannotContinue reading ““Steal” – Nayana Nair”