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“Love?” – Nayana Nair

I wanted too little
and yet you who speaks of all the riches of this world
you could not give me the little that I wanted.
Not because you can’t
but because you would rather not.

I am poisonous.
I am the worst,
the one people should avoid.
All my sorrows are my punishment for not being what you wanted.
All my weakness is something to be ridiculed.
I should be okay
or even rejoice when you question my mental stability
everyday as a joke.

This is what your love has taught me.

Can it still be called love?
Am I still obliged to love you back in a kinder way,
when all you have done is to take pride
that you loved someone twisted as me
as if you have made the biggest sacrifice of your life.

About Nayana Nair

Hi, I am Nayana Nair. I'm 25. Just a crazy girl who has tons of things to talk about....not much organized thoughts sadly. I like to talk about everything...mostly..every conversation of mine turns into a monologue.... So I decided I should start writing a blog..rather than chat.... I'm very much passionate about music, psychology and literature.... Moderate interest in science..... I always want to be a writer (and also a teacher)..But I don't think I have the skills required...this blog is just my attempt at becoming the writer I always wanted to be...Blogging for few years, I have realized I am more of a poet (although, I am not sure that I am good enough for that label)...I hope I realize more about myself through writing. Thanks for dropping by!! Hope I didn't disappoint. :)

10 responses »

  1. This poem is kind of strange and I am a bit lost….

    Reply
    • he he 🙂
      I know it is bit weird poem. And though it doesn’t correctly have a unity of thought. But there was something in the way these disjointed thoughts looked that I didn’t want to alter it.
      As of what the poem is about…I will try to elaborate…but not sure whether I will be able to. In some relationship, one person is dependent on the weakness of the other to feel good about themselves. They feel proud to have loved beneath them and there will be always someone who they are better than. Kind of like, the inferiority (or the assumption that they are) fuels their ego. And the issue is this kind of love (or shall we call it a emotional dependency) never tries to heal the other person’s heart, but in fact tries to keep them wounded and hurt. Because of they change the status quo and the basis of the relationship is challenged.
      I tried to write from the perspective of the person who is already suffering in life and the love he/she finds hurts them more because of this dependency on their state of sadness and self-complex.
      Do I make any sense? I hope I do.
      🙂

      Reply
      • aha.. thanks. yes, I understand better now. Personally I though most people have relationship when they are comfortable with each other and complement other weakness. But maybe true, some people use other weakness for the advantage.

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