“Yellow kills happiness” – Nayana Nair


And across this street is my old home,
the one I won’t ever visit.
This year they have painted it yellow.
How sad is that, isn’t it?
My mother hated that color.
She said that yellow kills happiness.
She said such colors convinced even a happy person,
that their smile is not enough.
Her smile, as a rule, was mostly not enough for anyone
and it made sense to me that she would hate
to compete with her wallpapers, her furniture,
her mirror, her curtains – for the sake of validating
her existence and importance.

The woman who stole our lives years later – I heard her
telling my mother
that “she was an insecure woman, that she was bound to lose”.
As if she, who paints this house now
with horrible colors every year, knew what loss is.
My mother – she liked browns and greys and greens.
She grew life out of her blood.
She loved dearly and irrationally-
whenever she sat still
and saw at us smiling and playing,
she would break into tears.
We loved her more dearly for that.

She loved that house
and the man that owns it.
She hated herself a bit too much.
She tried not to
but saving her was a work she had to do by herself
-a tiring chore, no one wanted to be part of.
She brought us the most beautiful yellow frocks one day
and looked at us, trying to love something impossible through us.
She looked at us hoping that her love for one thing
could make her bear her hate for another.
Like a fool, she believed
that her trying would mean something to this world.


  1. Athira says:

    Nayana, you helps me to visualise the scenes through the lines..

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Thanks a lot dear 🙂 😀
      Your words give me a feeling that maybe I am improving in my writing. so like really means a lot 🙂

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Really glad that you liked my poem 🙂
      Thank you so much 🙂 😀

      Have a beautiful day ahead. 🙂

  2. Rahul Gaur says:

    This was a fantastic read! Loved the ending.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      I am really glad that you enjoyed reading my work 🙂
      Thank you so much 🙂 😀

  3. Y si le pusieras una traducción al español? Abrazo y te saludo.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Since I have no knowledge of Spanish, I can’t actually put a translation officially. Sorry about that. I wish I could.

      Thank you for taking so much effort into reading my work.
      Means a lot. I am really grateful for that.

      (Como no tengo conocimientos de español, no puedo publicar una traducción oficialmente. Lo siento por eso. Ojalá pudiera.

      Gracias por tomarse tanto esfuerzo en leer mi trabajo.
      Significa mucho. Estoy muy agradecido por eso.)

      1. Algún amigo? lo importante es que aplaudimos tu vocación hacia la poesía. Abrazo y bello día.

  4. Painting with words, here, you did.
    A great poem.

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Really glad that you liked my poem 🙂
      Thank you so so much for your kind words 🙂 😀

      1. Great pleasure, Nayana 🙂

  5. besondersite says:

    You write so beautifully ❤

    1. Nayana Nair says:

      Thank you so much dear 🙂
      Really glad that you liked my poem 🙂 😀 Means a lot 🙂

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